What haven’t I been doing these last few weeks? No clue. The idea that my absenteeism is a direct result of my procrastination which is a symptom of my  inability to maintain a clear head in times of confusion when I should clearly be concentrating to feed exclusive blog posts to my many, many followers is clearly ludicrous. Readers, sadly, I have been busy not being able to follow my own shadow and consequently finding myself unable to catch up with myself. Needing the world to “just stop” for a minute while I catch up should be or I imagine probably is commonplace in this fast paced world of ours. 

Dealing with damp, brought on by a leaking toilet, taking a tumble drier pump apart without knowing what to do once separated, again is a fool’s errand, but the hope remains.

“Maybe, just maybe, it’s the fluff”

The thought the useless man with an adjustable screwdriver dreams of to be true, so as to mitigate a stranger with plumbing tools entering our house and charging us anything he fucking wants, thats what modern natural selection is, soon we will be a population of tradespeople providing temporal quotes for the greater good. Everyone with something to sell, the cash payments gathering finger scum and hand paste as they circle round the WR6 postcode, passed from person to person, dirtier and dirtier, heavier and heavier, and ultimately useless in the Tesco self service lane.

Ive got more to say, but my hair is just too clean and too floppy to concentrate at the moment and J (my local hairdresser) is too busy to fit me in, having said that, I’ve not checked with the telephone. 

Best leave it eh?