The woods in lock down, no one is allowed in or out without the permission of the ministry and will be closed to visitors until further notice. There has been a situation regards my dog, Benny and Hattie, C’s dog. They have been gamboling around, getting under my feet, dangerous levels of under feet activity finally caught up with me today as I tumbled arse over tit landing in the mud, leaves and possibly a little bit of fox shit, prompting Hattie to eye me with hunger as I got up, wishing she could rub over my foxy whiffy leg.

So with this in mind we plan to execute a Health and Safety study to see if there is any way we could make the woods a safer place for walkers; at the moment the outside is a

Terrifying Place to Be.

Walkers and visitors must be warned and an idea of roping them together encouraging single file walking has been discussed, the possibility of silence in the woods has also come up in conversation until we realised we were breaking the rule and so we abandoned that one.

M told us he wasn’t fond of his wellingtons, after not trying before buying; a school boy error. I think in the current climate maybe a discussion over the purchase of a new pair may be a good idea; even a Ministry outing to a Wellington shop, we shall wear our best uniform.

RIP to the frog, which prompted C to jump and run away, she doesn’t like frogs, especially dead ones.