March 7th 2020

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Fucking idiots, i really need a poo and am having to scratch around for kitchen roll and newspaper, its like living in the 50’s again, with the evil tracing paper loo roll found in the out door privy. My visit to Tesco this evening produced sweets, dairy products, vegetables but no toilet paper. The shelves are bare, a whole half aisle emptied, its not like the Corona virus gives you the shits, it’s not dysentery, nor diarrhoea, and if the people are panic buying toilet paper to blow their noses and the flush down the loo, then I hope the sewers block up, back up and flood your homes, at night when you’re asleep and you’re woken up with a pungent smell, the smell of disappointment.

I buy large packs of toilet paper, because thats how economies of scale work, but theres always an issue as to where to store the fucking stuff, this is now the case in many house holds, suck it up bog roll hoarders. I couldn’t believe as I was buying my usual 25 packs of penne today that the trolleys were piled high with poo paper. Plenty of Gin, wine and beer on the shelves, what is the world coming to? I ask you.

My advice is to grow up, stop reading the Daily mail, the Daily Express, The Sun and the Mirror, listen to the professionals, the experts instead of the scaremongers otherwise we’ll all be coming round to your house for a shit. I know where you live.

11 comments

    • It’s unbelievable, it’s frightening to see certain sections of society breaking down over loo roll. If this virus escalates then certain sections are screwed, namely the selfish. I travelled through India and Nepal years ago for about 8 months, I didn’t use toilet paper, that’s just how it is, I got used to it in about … a day. People must learn to adapt. In an odd way, I’m finding the Covid 19 slightly exciting. It’s an anthropologists dream to see it unfolding in front of my eyes

      Like

  1. I searched four supermarkets for toilet paper. All have them were sold out.
    I nipped back to the first (closest to my little nest) to pick up some other groceries and they must have had a delivery since I was there as the shelves were full of toilet rolls. So rather than buying one pack of nine rolls, I bought two packs because I don’t want to have to search high and low for a basic item.

    I guess it shows one of our biggest fears, nobody really cares about running out of teabags, but running out of toilet paper would be a pain!

    Liked by 1 person

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