Drunk as the Lords

Seeing this empty shell of a frog this morning, or yesterday evening, I cannot be sure such is the frenetic nature of Covid Isolation, it made me wonder. Do frogs shed their entire bodies like snakes do? Is this a new step in the evolution of amphibians due to an excess of flies bought on by the amount of food waste we have been producing over the course of this pandemic and before  Eating out of recipe boxes has become the norm and from where i’m stood Gusto seems to be catering to a nation of fatties. We always have tons left over which we try to freeze or reuse but invariably stuff gets jettisoned, magical maggots appear magically leading to flies, which means it’s bounty time for the frogs. And with a rich diet for the frogs comes a new found wealth which they seem to chose to spend on new skin. If they have them in that awful game “Fortnite” then why on earth cannot frogs too? It’s not like the recent boom in harvest mice sweat shops has got a backlog to contend with, Frog skins seemed to be the next logical step; and check out the tiny mouse hands stitching. 

An American asked on Twitter today if British people are always going to the pub as they seem to be on the British films and soap operas we export to the world. It’s part of our culture see? We introduced the world to everyday drinking, as opposed to drinking on special occasions and the like. Now people will find the smallest excuse to crack open a bottle of wine or can of beer, to pop down to the juicer for a swift half. In truth I believe as a nation of drinkers we seem to have an awful lot of drinkers who will drink from a drip tray or the equivalent of. Some of the piss which is sold as lager actually boils my piss and I will rather die of thirst than drink a pint of Fosters, and frequently have. Warm bitter can fuck off too, and smooth pour which is bitter for the politicians who’s beer and Cider menu in the House of Commons is utter tripe, why would anyone stay there for a pint after work? Its certainly not for the company I’d suggest, bunch of mediocre specimens. Nothing outstanding about them aside form the ability to lie and lie and lie and lie and lie and lie over and over and over just so they can line their ham lined pockets and guffaw as they drink another swig of nondescript fizzy piss as they prepare to rape the country once again with a thinly veiled attempt at smoke and mirrors, when everyone knows its just some shitty vape  fog which barely conceals what the bastards are getting up to, and they don’t care anyway.

So I said to my American correspondent, that yes we are constantly popping to the pub where we seem to live a life of perpetual drunkenness and still manage to hold down a job as a nation of functioning alcoholics. Why else would our government be doing what they are doing were they not massively drunk and this is one massive long bender which everyone is too terrified to come out of, to scared to be sober again. No one wants to clean the sick from the sitting room carpet do they.

3 comments

    • Oh god! I hope your wife is ok, my Dad had a big one some years back snd I was terrified, had no clue as to what to expect so I read some books so I could understand. One was called after stroke which sealed with the practicalities and the other was a true to life tale about a journalist from the guardian who actually had one. Both interesting and both invaluable. A little knowledge helps a lot, hope she’s ok

      Like

      • There were some anomalies on her MRI they couldn’t account for but seems there is little damage unlike the one she had in 2013. My father died 😞 of a stroke at 74. She is home because they are emptying the Hospital for Covid-19 patients. We have a National emergency with roughly 1000 cases per day.

        Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s