Get well soon Mr Fandango, rest up and get some Lemsip down you, with extra honey naturally.

Chancellor of the exchequer is in trouble with no one really for not paying £3million in tax. He avoided it see, and if you’re in this British government, then it’s fine. One can do what one pleases with impunity and be damned the meddlesome left wing or “fair” press.

Its the time of year again where bags of dog shit appear in the hedgerows and ditches of this fair land, what a delight to see the bright plastic nestling in a puddle or to hear the incessant rustle of the bag stuck in a hawthorn. Just stop it people, we’ve all got bins at home I’m assuming

But over the weekend aside form another gigantic Tory scandal, which happen on a pretty much daily basis these days. It seems when I arrived back from London on Sunday afternoon, I had delivered 6 metal kazoos, in 6 wonderful metallic colours with strings to hang them round your necks so the urge to bring out the kazoo can be swiftly done, and the fuzzy buzzy sound which tickles your lips with a fizzy feeling and everyone can enjoy the music. Why did I get the Kazoos? Because I was drunk, that’s all there is to it, and speaking to my friend “L” from Clifton up here in the windy lands, he told me that there is a 2 pint limit in his home after which it is illegal to order anything from the internet, that’s a good plan as far as I can make out.