A-Z Challenge: My Theme; Adoption. The letter B

A-Z challenge 2018

IMG_0123Birth:

We’ve all been there, it happened to me although I can’t remember it, but I imagine it to be similar to my daughters birth, but even more similar to my sons! I was born in November 1971, the actual date, I don’t think matters and I don’t think I need to reveal it suffice to say I am a Scorpio for what thats worth, and whatever that means.

I was born to a young mother and young father who were not married and barely out of school. I was special, as I was a breech baby according to my papers and weighed in at 6lbs and 14 ounces. I spent 10 days as an illegitimate child with my birth mother, I’ll call her Biomum and my birthfather will be Biodad. My fate was decided before I was born; my Biofolks (the appropriate collective noun) had discussed and decided that I deserved a proper start in life with loving, older and more established people. My Biodad was training and would not qualify in his chosen career for nearly 4 years, at that time they planned to marry, but up until that date home life would have been unstable. Both sets of parents had volunteered to bring me up as their own but my Biofolks had the final say, and as previously mentioned, decided to give me up for the greater good.

So 10 days I spent in a home with my Biomum whilst a suitable foster carer was located nearby, at that point I read that I was developing well and drinking from the bottle and sleeping well, a very contented baby with;

“very distinctive features and a straight well shaped nose for so small a baby- and quite a lot of fairish hair, you can tell he is a boy immediately”

I’m very lucky to have a folder which has a veritable treasure trove of papers, letters, certificates and miscellaneous correspondence between agencies, doctors, the church and both sets of parents and grandparents. I think it is only about the third or forth time i’ve opened this substantial file since receiving it. These priceless typed and handwritten scripts are the answers to the questions which other people are able to ask their parents as they grow older. I get to sit and read and imagine.

My Biomum and Biodad handed me over to the Foster carer amongst a terrific amount of tears and emotion. I think of this moment often when I look at my kids and think what a heart-wrenching ordeal for them, especially the mother. I believe it would break my heart.

So as a baby of 10 days,  recently  breech born, I was off on my travels, from Nuneaton to Market Harborough and then ultimately to Moor Hatch in Foxton. I spent 41 days with my foster mother and her brood of foster children and although I know very little of this time I suspect it was a happy time as the letters I have reveal I was growing, eating, sleeping and shitting; everything a healthy baby does. Christmas came and went and my Biomum came to visit, which, again, must have been so hard for her.

In the meantime, during the latter part of November and into December people were working frantically behind the scenes to find some parents for me. This happened just before Christmas and I was to be delivered to Moor Hatch (thats the house name) on December 30th 1971.

My new adoptive parents took care of me on that day, and apparently had a long chat with my new Dad who was indeed confirmed to be sensitive and intelligent, my new Mum couldn’t speak, so overcome as she was.

So on that chilly Thursday afternoon in December just prior to the birth of the new year, I feel I was born again, I was given a second chance. Not many people experience 2 births, I feel very lucky.

 

11 comments

  1. I’m really liking this series.
    You are indeed lucky that you have all this paperwork that gives you some sort of background on how things look. I hear these stories about people never finding out who their biofolks really were. It must chew at you in a human curiosity kind of way. Have you ever connected with your biofolks? Is that going to be address another day?

    Like

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