Yesterday I went to M&S to panic buy jeans. I tried 3 pairs on and took a chance with the forth pair which was the same style, same size, different colour. Turns out I had to go back into Worcester to exchange them; Black trousers seem to have a size system of their own. Good luck to them, black is the new burgundy so I’m told.

Yesterday I went to Tescos to buy some food for the evening, some sweets for the kids for the evening, some beer and wine for the adults for the evening and some toilet paper for the shits we all have to do, be it in the evening, the morning (my favourite time) or the afternoon (the domain of the homeworker). Seems like people all had the same idea, seems like everyone had the same predicament, everyone must have needed to go to the loo at the same time, sometimes this sort of thing happens and the paranormal people get involved. Fortunately I was able to go for a shit in my neighbours house and my son used some stale bread, Sunday came, I plopped out to the shops and toilet roll parity was restored just in time for the ladies of the house.

I am willing to be involved in an international pandemic, I am prepared to possibly wipe my bottom without loo roll, I travelled to India and managed for 8 months perfectly fine with the rest of the population, however I am not prepared to tolerate the scaremongering right wing media flaming the fires of paranoia, pasta and toilet roll are not going to get you through this, I might suggest listening to the experts could be the most sensible option to get through the situation we seem to find ourselves in.

I was speaking to my Mum this week, she’s old, naive and racist as the next Mum and told me that her coffee morning was going ahead next week and there was no problem because none of her friends had been abroad, specifically the East, Italy must be infected because some Asians had been there. I’m not going to critique what she said, suffice to say that if you read this blog regularly you’ll probably understand that I disagree with my Mum. Kids and parents often do. But when we speak of the legendary Corona outbreak of 2020, I’ll be proud to say that I paid a part in that, however indirectly.

God bless the Right wing Scaremongering press.

I don’t mean that by the way, and my site is not religious, despite being called “the ministry… etc” It’s a Monty P reference, and I abhor the Right wing press, the squares on the Daily Mail Crossword are far too small, as they need to make enough space for the verbal diarrhoea they pedal.