No walking for me today, an electrical man delivered an electrical car first thing for me to test drive. Its a Kia Niro, its got no gears and looks just like any normal car, so all you have to do is press the accelerator and go, its a child’s car like Alcopops are a child’s drink, and cocktails, in the case of my daughter until she realises how much they cost and then they can be classed as a drink which her Dad buys her, special occasions only, and thank god we don’t live near to a cocktail bar.

The dog was having a hair cut too, at 1 and I had to watch a really awful brand relaunch today on the internet for my company, after the last brand relaunch a few years ago which didn’t go so well. The various contributors contributing from bland dining rooms, or in front of book shelves half empty save for a few lever arch files and a sorry spider plant; we’re not in the 80’s. Its all about attention to detail for fucks sake and i’m no re-branding expert, but everything is open to scrutiny now. As they sit in front of some book shelves spouting the waffle and buzz words, of course no ones listening, they may as well be in a  zoo, the viewers are either wondering if the presenter is wearing any trousers, or underwear, what the hell is the picture over the right shoulder and what books are on the bookshelves, is that the “Joy of Sex”, “Mein Kampf”?

To explain away the disastrous results of the first rebranding was that the whole process was a two tier operation, of course it was;
First we change the colour of the logo.

Second (now) we tell people what we do., and what they can use our stuff for.

Genius, but they’ve looked after me in this shitty situation we all find ourselves in and so I’m not going to complain nor name and shame. I will when I win pots of gold, but until then, its a no from me.

Today was the second day that my work laptop wouldn’t speak to my work  equipment and it became evident to me that I should probably call someone up in IT to get it sorted, of course  they were not there, none of them, they never are and if they are its always whens’m on a bad line or some such.

Taking Benny down to the dog hair cutters shop and leaving his future appearance  to the vision of the beautician’s judgement, I found no where to park and had to try and drive up a bank, which I missed, plunged my wheel into a drain and caused a horrendous puncture on to a tyre which was replaced on Thursday, last week, the diagnosis was pretty empirical as I stepped out of the car to hear the final hiss of air leaving the gaping hole in the rubber. The last time I heard such hissing was from under my sink which I assumed was housing a family of snakes living there. Of course I know I didn’t believe that but didn’t want to admit to the water pipe being damaged just before we were due to fly to Australia. If you ignore it, it will go away, right? Those 4 days before the flight were pretty stressful after having to get in a plumber at short notice who was called Paul Paul. He had to make safe, dig an enormous hole outside the front of the house and destroy the front path, the man from the water board, we gave him the sob story, Australia etc etc, and got the council to pay when the insurance paid for the rest. So my tyre, flat. I am 1 mile from home, and I need to get my work equipment going, my dauhghter is in the car, she will be bored after 10 minutes, I have to call the AA. Fuck that, i’ll drive it slowly home, which I did. Tomorrow when the rubber men come to replace the rubber tyres, we’ll see what the rim damage is (Oooerr missus).

Benny looks amazing by the way, like a new dog, short all over the body, but long on the ears and the tail, like an alien covered in Moleskin.

Then I failed to get my equipment going, the daughter cooked dinner, I fell asleep in front of the news at 7pm. Good night.